Mommy Matters: Requisite Sappy Post

Monday, November 29, 2004

Requisite Sappy Post

I love the smell of baby's breath. Not the little white flowers that come in those cliche' bouquets of roses. The breath of an actual baby. Okay, I can own that this may be a little weird to some of you, however I would wager that any mom who has nestled her cheek up against that of her sleeping baby would understand what I'm talking about.

I really wish I could describe it for those who don't know. It smells light, and sweet, and warm. To me it embodies that fundamental closeness that exists between a mother and her infant. Intimacy. Oneness.

The human infant has the most complex and intelligent mind of any other infant of any other species. It is also the most helpless. A baby is born from his mother's womb and clings to her. He knows her by the sounds of her voice, and by her smell. He needs her in every imaginable way.

A mother gives birth to her child and gives to him in every imaginable way. It is as if she is now holding her own heart in her arms. To see it hurting or wanting in any way would be to physically suffer.

I can't count the times I sat with my babies, nursing them in the peaceful glow of the nightlight, so desperate for sleep, but grateful for that moment. They would fall asleep, and I would cradle them up close to my face. I would whisper little lullabies to them, and gently rub noses with them. I would linger with them, even after their tummies were full. I would forget for a moment how tired I was, and that I could now tuck my baby in and go back to bed. I would stare at the way they would rest their perfect little lips apart just so as they slumbered, and I would lean into them and breath them in. I would drink in their sweet, brand-new breath.

Even now my Little Man still has that baby breath, and I find myself rubbing noses with him when he yawns, or kissing his cheeks while he's laughing trying to catch that sweet smell. As they get older they lose it. It disappears with the macaroni and cheese and chocolate milk and blue raspberry suckers. I will never forget that smell though, long after it has left my babies' lips. It is entangled in the memories I have of their infancy, and the intimacy we shared that is the basis of our relationships today. They may be walking and talking and growing taller, but when I hold them in my arms, it is still my heart I hold.

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10 Comments:

What a beautiful post! It brought tears to my eyes, because I remember Princess when she was a baby with that smell. I used to hold her and just drink it in. Now she is a very grown up soon to be 4, but I still hold her and drink her in, because I know that my days of being able to cuddle her just because we both want to are numbered. And I cherish every precious moment of it!

By Crazy Single Mom, at 6:05 AM

I understand completely. Wonderful post!

By Mel, at 12:57 PM

Great, just what I needed, a tear jerker! Lady, that post needs a disclaimer. Now, hand over that Kleenex box.

It is SO true. And I miss it, I miss that dearly. Thanks, I needed to read something that would stir my soul and make me feel good all over, even the tears were nice. ;o)

By Zee, at 9:39 PM

That's a beautiful post. i totally agree.

By Yume, at 11:34 PM

You're making me cry! Evil!

Though my two younger kids are step-kids, I was lucky enough to hold both of them within a couple of days of their birth. Unfortunately, they moved away when Perrin was about 6-7 months old. :( They were just passing through my area again when Darcy was born - I babysat for her when she was just three days old...then I didn't see her again until she was 3. :( Regardless, I was lucky to get the little time in with them when I did.

I always felt an attachment to those two - maybe somewhere deep down, I knew I'd be raising them as my own someday.

By Meg:, at 7:56 AM

Beautiful. I am moved - you are SO right about that smell.

By Unknown, at 11:45 AM

Thanks for making me cry at work! I love the smell of a clean baby's head. You know, right after you wash their hair in the bath? My youngest will be two this month, and it's just not the same anymore. This post really made my biological clock CLANG BANG TICK.

By Anonymous, at 2:04 PM

Thanks for making me cry at work! I love the smell of a clean baby's head. You know, right after you wash their hair in the bath? My youngest will be two this month, and it's just not the same anymore. This post really made my biological clock CLANG BANG TICK.

Beth
http://supermom3604.diaryland.com

(I apologize if this posts twice. My browser keeps hiccuping somehow.)

By Anonymous, at 2:04 PM

Thanks for making me cry at work! I love the smell of a clean baby's head. You know, right after you wash their hair in the bath? My youngest will be two this month, and it's just not the same anymore. This post really made my biological clock CLANG BANG TICK.

Beth
http://supermom3604.diaryland.com

(I apologize if this posts twice. My browser keeps hiccuping somehow.)

By Anonymous, at 2:04 PM

Hmm...you made me reflect upon my own mommy. Maybe that is why she cares so much for me (even though I do not like it).

By Darnell Clayton, at 6:25 PM

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Name: Christine
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I'm the Mom of two. They drive me crazy. I love them dearly. I want one more. I'm not insane, yet. My hubby says I'm a snob with an inferiority complex. There is more to me than being a mother. I just don't remember any of it.

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